Aspen Hills Psychology

I was recently speaking with my husband around how the access to air travel has been both a benefit and hinderance to families. There is this constant pressure to travel with your kids and visit family or friends out of state. There can also be the pressure for either parent to travel a lot for work while managing the stress of having young kids. Moreover, mothers are faced with the decisions on when to have out of town visitors after the birth. This can put a significant amount of stress on a new mom and she can become overwhelmed with feeling the pressure to entertain when she needs to heal and recover. I work with moms all the time on how to set strong boundaries around travel and how it is okay to say no. What has been your own experience?

The comments we make to women when they are pregnant send this silent message that they need to look a certain way. For instance, complimenting a woman on how good she looks in pregnancy is sending the message that she is meeting some standard. But there is no standard way to look or feel in pregnancy. Everyone will move through pregnancy differently and all women will look differently. That is okay. Our bodies deserve some acknowledgement for the job they are doing in growing a human. Also, women need to have people ask how they feel during pregnancy so they can remember that they matter too. So here is my gentle reminder to ask a pregnant woman how she feels instead of saying anything about the way she looks.

I am guilty of thinking this before I had my own kids. I thought being at home with a baby would be relaxing...I am laughing as I type this because relaxing is the last word I would use to describe being at home with a baby. Has anyone else been told something similar?

The expectations we have around motherhood are often not accurate. I know I was shocked by how hard motherhood was several times during my own journey. I think the only thing that I expected about motherhood that was accurate was the love I would have for my children. Other than that, everything has been different than what I expected. And this isn’t just the first time around, I was shocked by motherhood the second time around too. We forget that there are so many factors th...at impact our journey in motherhood and many are outside of our control. For instance, the temperament of your child, the amount of support you will get from family or your body’s ability to produce milk. If you are in a stage where your expectations are not lining up with your reality, just know that it is normal and it doesn’t mean you are doing something wrong. Motherhood is a journey where you will constantly feel not prepared and confused. There are no seasoned mothers out there. We are all just trying to figure it out as we go. See more

Here is a gentle reminder to be careful with the accounts you follow on Instagram. I have found myself following accounts where children are ill and it brought up a lot of fears for myself. I needed to remind myself that I don’t need to follow accounts that bring up fears for me. While it is wonderful to be supportive on this platform to families going through a tough time, you also owe it to yourself to create distance from these accounts if they are having a negative impact on your wellbeing. We always need to be asking ourselves, Is this making me feel better or worse? Your wellbeing is important.